Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
Even my vagina gasped.
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
You straight up wore me out. This should be a proud moment for you. It's almost like my penis is asking for a timeout. But not really
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
My liver appreciates your vow of avoiding matrimony
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
You know why I love being a regular at this bar? It's because at a certain point last call is only a suggestion.
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Randomize
