everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
Randomize
