i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
Randomize
