my fart just smelled so bad i acutally gagged
just because you are now my girlfriend does not mean you can text me nasty shit
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
Omg I joined a choir last night...
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Randomize
