why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
I can't believe you're asking me to think of a sincere, creative way to apologize to your penis at 2 am.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
Randomize
