pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
Randomize
