in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
every time i drive by the road she lives on, i scream in the car "i'm sorry i'm sleeping with your boyfriend!" makes me feel less whore-y.
I just woke up in the back of his van. Bring me a sunkist.
alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
I just farted so loud that my cat got so scared he fell off the couch.
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
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