i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
I don't know whether I should be pissed that there's glitter in my bed or proud that there's semen in there too.
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
She just started grabbing all the hospital's rubber gloves and face masks and shoving them in her purse, saying, "My tax money paid for these!"
Found out it was only pneumonia. We celebrated hydrocodone cough syrup. Two long island ice teas at lunch and the random white powder we found in her purse. Mother of the year award.
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
Drunkenly tried to auction off Merik's pancakes at Ihop. Apparently I make a great auctioneer. Also, no one wants 30 cent pancakes.
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
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