I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
I want to walk on stilts...naked
so remember that time i slept over and came home in the morning to realize i left my vibrator next to the faucet for parents and brothers to see? this is worse
An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
you left a giant bottle of vodka in my room from last night. does this serve as a parting gift or hush money?
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
Randomize