i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
Randomize
