So, we're in the car ready to fuck and she asks about my ex. I wave at my lap and say, "bye". She asks what I'm doing. I say, "waving goodbye to my erection"
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
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