You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
Aiming to get laid tonight but if it falls thru I'm either gonna make a mixtape for my sugar daddy or sew a teddy bear for his newborn
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
Randomize
