Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
If I could pick any std, I would pick genital herpes. Seriously. Have you seen the commercials? The lady is riding a fucking bike, swimming, and on a date. I have a perfectly fine vag and all I do is go to the library.
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
I am making dinner in lingerie and heels and there is a 75% chance his roommate is going to walk in on this.
Yup. There he is. This conversation is awkward.
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
The 666th photo in my phone is of him and if that's not a sign that he's secretly the Antichrist, idk what is. Also, bring more rum.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
Randomize
