I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
Randomize
