wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
don't judge my taste in strippers
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
Randomize
