I just saw a San Diego firetruck. No wonder they can't figure out how to fight wildfires if they get so fucking lost they end up in Nebraska.
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
...there was a woman in the stall next to me in the Walmart bathroom having a massive bowl movement and whispering "I'm sorry" over and over
We had sex on a dog bed..
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
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