Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
I threw a hotdog at the security guard and called the bartender "goodlooking for a 35 year old who was rode hard and put away wet"... I would have kicked me out too
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
Randomize
