What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
Randomize
