I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
Because I'm a hot mess throwing up in the litter box
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
Randomize
