At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
Just drove through Taco Johns wearing a drug rug and no pants. When I rolled down my window, the girl paused for a minute before saying "um... 4.07"
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
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