So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
Dear vodka that I hid in a water bottle in the backseat of Blairs car, I'm sorry that she gave you away to a man on side of the road with an over heated engine. I'm sure the car doesn't appreciate you as much as I would have.
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
Found a fruit roll up in my pocket this morning. This means my daughter has a peach blunt wrap in her lunchbox.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
my balls were so many shades of blue last night I could have used them as paint and replicated the entirety of Picaso's blue period. The girl was an art major I feel like this metaphor is appropriate.
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
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