And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?�
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