even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
While leaving the bar with another guy I told the bouncer I was sad his friend had a fiancee
You were drinking Everclear weren't you?
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
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