goodnight i made you a song goodbye
Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
Today's hangover is probably top 3 of all time. Just threw up in an envelope. I'm on the ferry and didn't want to get out to puke over the side because I thought I might fall in the river.
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
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