WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
I was sleeping pretty good until your cat pooped loudly. I dreamed that a full grown man was pooping on my ear. It startled me.
Do you think the firemen will remember me?
Yes. But you were sloppy, sobbing, and puked on two of them. You won't get in their pants.
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
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