and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
Randomize
