can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
I spent most of the stoned conversation with my dad proving to him that the Newfoundland is an actual dog and NOT a Snuffaluffagus-esque figment of my stoned imagination, while laughing over the fact there is actually a place caller Dildo, Canada. Have YOU taken time to be a good dad today?
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
I just left a 3 minute voicemail to the guy I want to fuck baby talking my cats and I don't know if I can delete it 😐
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
Randomize
