Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
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