hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
im about to go through the checkout with 3 flasks and a wedding card. let the judgement begin!
update: cashier guessed cash bar before i could say anything. completely bypassed "dry" and knew cash bar right away. i love this state.
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
Randomize
