your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
Woke up naked on a bed full of money, doughnuts, and keys that weren't mine. Unsent dick pick on phone, and cheap cigar butt on my pillow. Also...I maybe hotwired my car.
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
Omg I'm having dinner at chilli's with a guy who is arguing that getting a weed leaf tatoo on his neck will prevent him from getting a job as a dental assistant
Well that actually sounds reasonable
Randomize