so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
The beers last night were like the tears from god
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
#1- I went to button my shirt only to find they were all mising. #2- I'm so fu@king sore I feel like I was sweating to the oldies all night. #3- this pounding headache I have, I blame solely on Jennifer. Everyone sounds like Billy Mays when they talk. I remember nothing from last night, I'm concerned.
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
Randomize
