She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
Did you hear me? I HAVE THE CONTENTS OF AN NBA PLAYER'S CONDOM IN MY BEDROOM TRASHCAN!! This shit is potentially worth millions of dollars to a fertile young female who is ovulating. How do I sell it fast??
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
