Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
the cop asked for your social security number and you gave her your high school locker combo
I asked her if she wanted to make this a permanent exclusive thing instead of a fuck buddy thing, and she just looked at me like I'm an idiot.
That's because you are an idiot.
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
In line at the grocery store. The girl ahead of me is in a wetsuit and just bought 3 cases of beer and a bottle of vodka. I want to go where she's going...
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
Randomize
