i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
some girl just asked me if I was that guy that hooked up with nine girls in one night. officially a local celebrity. gonna try and autograph her boobs.
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
Got out of the uber to projectile vomit in the McDonald's drive thru. Gonna take a break from the Cuervo for a while.
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
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