You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
only if we run a train.
done.
he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
Bad part of last night: I puked in my hair. Good part of last night: I assembled a posse.
You kept pulling me aside saying "look what I found"
Randomize
