You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
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