You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
NoShamevember. You game?
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
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