Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
He turned down a handjob. A HANDJOB. I know I'm no Jessica Simpson, but...
Actually, she's fat now, so...
Fuck. I AM Jessica Simpson.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
