If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
No I can't cure herpes. I'm an EMT, not Jesus.
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
Brb crying the tears of my youth
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
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