then he goes, "ok, i have to go talk to the girl i'm semi-talking to/dating and see if i'm in trouble" WHAT IS MY LIFE?!
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
No night ever ends well that starts with "you know what this needs? More tequila".
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
Randomize
