let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
On the bright side his mom approves of me. Though it's apparently because she sleeps with married men and has a soft spot for "fellow homewreckers"
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
Randomize
