I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
Public service announcement: if you would like to continue receiving blow jobs, a 25% increase in fuck-giving will be expected immediately, and you're expected to give an actual flying fuck at least once a week. Brought to you by the ad council.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
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