Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
His uber religious wife caught us having anal sex in their bed..... she called us sodomites. Can you even be a sodomite if you're a girl?
You're not a sodomite. You're a whore. Tell her to get the insults right. Did she try to save you with Jesus?
She said she'd pray for me. Man, if I had just caught my husband balls deep in some ho, I'd say fuck the praying and kick her ass.
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
