Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
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