I cockslap morals
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
I just threw up in the bathroom next to the zebra exhibit. The kids don't know I skipped a beat. Best nanny, ever.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
You know you have crossed to the dark side of marriage when a nap is more important than jacking off
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
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