Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
Randomize
