sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
Public service announcement: if you would like to continue receiving blow jobs, a 25% increase in fuck-giving will be expected immediately, and you're expected to give an actual flying fuck at least once a week. Brought to you by the ad council.
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
Randomize