She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
Three questions. How does a tomato drive a car, how does an asparagus play a guitar, and how am I still so high that I chose to watch Veggie Tales?
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
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