Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
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