i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
"I wonder if vinegar is some sort of magical hangover cure" "...no I was definitely still drunk and drinking vinegar because I was thirsty"
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
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