i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
My body has become completely dependent on Text Twist. I can't poop without it.
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
decision: in honor of being in new orleans this weekend all my drunk texts will be en francais
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
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